Saturday, May 24, 2014

The Crow Awaits Us All

"Josh, how about a quick pre-marathon 'interview'? I say interview, but I think I only need to ask you one question: Are you ready?"

"Feel free to go nuts with it, take whatever angle you like. Talk about training, race strategy, how you plan on crushing the will of your opponents just after the gun goes off, etc. Sound good?"

The question was asked: Are you ready? 
To be perfectly honest, I'm more unsure than I've been in a very long time. To really elude to my true thoughts could admit weakness and of being vulnerable, and I just won't do that. I'll never bet against me, I'll never count myself out, no matter what. I have to be realistic. I haven't done any individual specific training for this marathon other than some solid long runs on the weekends. No workouts that would give me the feedback that would give me any clarity now. 
Throughout this process of getting to Sundays marathon in Burlington I have been asking myself a lot of questions and doing a lot of self reflection on my daily runs. In my vision quest for answers in the universe of nature, I've captured the attention of my beginnings from the Quarry of the Gods. Through my question asking I was presented, not with answers, but questions to my questions. 
In the booming ominous voice only my ears and body could handle I was asked: Where have all the good men gone and where are all the Gods? Where's the street-wise Hercules to fight the rising odds?
This was a stealthy shock of electricity to my soul and I knew. I knew I needed to become a white knight upon a fiery steed. I need to forego my nights where I toss and I turn and I dreamt of what I was to need. 
The Old Gods smiled a sinister smile upon me and one spoke clearly: I need a hero, I'm holding out for a hero, till the end of the night. 
Then the giggles of the fair beautiful goddesses chimed in a sultry whisper: He's gotta be strong and he's gotta be fast and he's gotta be fresh from the fight. 
I understood these beauties, they needed me to fulfill a destiny and they wanted me to hold out to the morning light, they wanted me to be sure and be larger than life. So far, all of the requests and questions were within my abilities. 
The Massacre of Sleepy Hollow is still fueling my confidence and the taste of souls still drips from my jowls. Relaxing has been the hardest part as I'm super anxious to hit the streets and see where my fitness lies. Do I go out to run 2:25, or play it safe (if it's considered safe and not too fast) of 5:40's? Who the cuss knows?!!! 
So I counseled my own again. Through a vivid dream I was reached and told that somewhere after midnight in my wildest fantasy somewhere just beyond my reach, there's someone reaching back for me, and the gods would be pulling me through the race if I needed them too. 
I would need to consider the elements. I would be racing on the thunder and rising with the heat I would be a Superman and sweep the goddesses off their feet. 
It was beginning to get clearer and clearer of my goal and what I would need to do. Up where the mountains meet the heavens above out where the lightning splits the sea I could swear that there's someone somewhere watching me through the wind and the chill and the rain and the storm and the flood I can feel the approach like a fire in my blood. 
I've convinced myself that, "I got this," and just need to get to the starting line. I feel like I have more people cheering and rooting me on this time around, which adds a bit of pressure. Well, in actuality, I'm the only one that adds any pressure. With a little help from my friends (Gods) everything will work itself out. I can only do what my fitness and physical capabilities will allow. The good thing is, I'm cussing awesome at subjecting myself to races and I will be able to tough, grit and grind. To all those thinking positive thoughts, thanks, to all those thinking negative thoughts: that adds friction and friction makes fire; so, also thanks bc I'm going to light a fire late in the race and will need that fuel! I'll need a miracle, but I'd rather be a hero. There needs to be a hero, and who better then the Last Hero Only Hope?!!!

1 comment:

  1. Congrats on the 2:29 at VCM! Hope the recovery is going well and looking forward to the race report when you get to it!